I hate it.

I hate it i hate it i hate it blargh.

I'm serious, today was possibly the worst day of my life. I'm going to go through what happened in order of when it happened, which also happens to be ascending order of shittiness.

1. I've got tonsilitis, aka "throat aids" for the second time in 2007, which wasn't really a surprise as I get it as frequently as most people get a common cold. I'm on antibiotics and have been popping capsules of magic all day, and have to for the next few days.

2. I got fired. Well, not so much fired as they gave me my notice and the like. So now I have to work until the end of next week, knowing that that's it and then I'm boned both money-wise and job-wise, as after getting the sack it becomes increasingly more difficult to find a job as you're lacking in any decent references. People are going to ask "why did you leave your previous job?" and my answer will be "because getting to harpenden for half past eight in the morning was more than difficult,then i threw up in the town centre because of a stomach bug, and then caught tonsilitis off a customer who obviously thought it was a lovely idea to spit on my face." Or I could always just shorten it to "i was late a couple times and had two sick days." Even so, no reference for me, and definitely no redundancy pay. Also no tax rebate, so it's looking more and more like I'm never actually going to go back to university, as I was waiting for that rebate so I could pay off the fees that I owe, rather than pay my mother a substantial amount of rent and live the good life for a few weeks.

3. Speaking of my mother, she collapsed with chest pains at work today, and was taken to hospital in an ambulance because they thought she'd had a heart attack. They gave her an ECG, did scans and X-Rays and apparently it isn't her heart but she's still had horrible pains in her chest this evening and even wanted to drive me home. I yelled at her for being an idiot whilst tears were rolling down my face because I'd been misinformed that she'd actually had a heart attack and I was still majorly freaked out, and then she just yelled at me to sit down and eat the dinner that my Grandmere made me before it got cold. I was extremely not-hungry at this point, and instead thought I was going to vomit, and swallowing was a bitch because of the swollen tonsils, but I managed to choke down this food and then we got a lift home from someone.

Sister is still there because she's got work in the morning, mother is hopefully going to spend the entire day in bed, and I am standing on the precipice of a torture-filled day standing behind a counter in a potentially hideous pink t-shirt because it's "triple points weekend, woo hoo!" and I've got to wear pink. I think I'll take something that I actually like and ask if I can wear that instead. If all fails, I'll just stick my tent smock on again and tell them that it's not my fault it's dirty, because I was promised a pink shirt.

I love how everyone only writes in these things when they're having a bad day and want to bitch and moan, but seriously after hearing about my mother and having everything hugely suck balls today I got to the point where I just wanted to come home, curl up in bed and slip back into old habits.

Aversion therapy is a pain in the ass and doesn't really work.

Where the fuck is my antiseptic gel.