i just wanna scream and lose control, throw my hands up and let it go, forget about everything and run away.

fuck! avril lavigne speaks sense! since when?! jesus, i just realised my songwriting prowess isn't even on par with that girl's. i am more than a little embarassed.

anyway, the week from hell is coming to a close, with just friday and saturday to go. my mood has been greatly improved by the fact that my ipod turned up from apple today, and they've actually sent me a new one because the other one was completely unsalvageable. I suppose the year warrantee thing's quite good in that sense because I can just get the thing replaced whenever it breaks without having to worry about paying for it, which was quite nice after only having it a week and (i reckon) having my sister destroy it out of spite

anyway, having music again is definitely lifting me a little, but i'm still greatly looking forward to having monday to myself so i can lie in bed, gabble all day and be miserable while recuperating from my throat aids.

except i won't be able to.

because i'll be out jobhunting in st albans, namely going into game and gamestation, telling the staff that i'm a huge WoW geek and definitely know my way around a DS, PS2, and PC. OMNOMNOMNOM BEST JOBS EVER. I would love to work in a game store, even if it was just a christmas temp job, it'd be so epic. I'd run around all day in awesome shirts and jeans making "woosh" noises, pulling stock forward and making amazing conversations with the people buying wow top-up cards and strategy guides.

"Hey have you tried the *whatever* arrangement in *some instance*? Shamans are totally more useful than Druids if you want support from every angle. I shit you not. Paladins suck, don't roll them." et cetera.

Anyway, I'm working my way closer and closer to the bottom of that bottle of bells, and it was one of the best bottles of whiskey i've ever had. it tastes reasonable with coke and is swiggable on its own, and so makes me very happy. it's also helping me sleep, which is nice. although i don't usually need help during this swing, but being able to stick out an entire night until around 7:30am is very enjoyable. i like the numbness too. i feel like i'm wrapped in a warm fuzzy blanket and it's comforting. soft and confortable.

far too comfortable really, i can imagine getting used to this feeling and then trying to wean myself off it. i don't need another problem to add to the list.

xx